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Sunday, September 03, 2017

Keep learning

Having difficulty to sleep again. Even though sometimes I'd already felt quite sleepy, but when I was about to put my head on pillow, the sleepiness is suddenly gone. Huh. Gone to nowhere. Geez.

So...

I try to put my mode on reading but it's too dark here. I can't see clearly and my iPad brightness couldn't help it too. So, I just forget about it. Hmm.. let's try sorting out unimportant topic(s) here. Just to kill the time.

When I was in form three, I had crushed with one guy. He was my classmate. He was prefect. One of best student in my batch during that time. Not so handsome but got his own style. I couldn't remember what made him so special for me but one thing I surely remember is I was crazy about him at that time.

Reminiscing about that so immature story, I guessed I was the foolish person on the earth. How can I did such stupid things in my life?

I was too naive. I trusted him so much. Because he was good with words. And I was easily be fooled by his words and promises. I almost got into 'serious' couple-ship. But luckily, we are not, because I got to know he cheated behind my back. He had another girl while adjusting my feeling. He is such horrible man.

He is one of my excuses why I barely get into serious relationship. I know maybe people would say it was just immature phase of teenager journey. People make mistakes. We live to learn. Yayaya. But its hard for me to forget what had been done. I don't keep any grudge against him. I forgive him but I don't easily forget the experience.

I learn from this experience and be more careful in future so that I don't be fooled twice.

As growing up, I realized, falling in love isn't a destination. Getting the right person isn't the ultimate goal. Having marital relationship isn't the mission of life. But, they are sent to our life is just to be a part of our journey. Not to complete but to complement.

He is not the only one who ever came to my life. He is not the only person who ever knocked my door. I had series of heart broken episodes in my life. So no blaming or pointing out other mistakes. I just want to remind myself that people come and go. Everyone that's been in my life has been there for a reason. Either to teach me, to love me or to experience life with me. Cheers for everything.

Allah never put us in condition that beyond our capabilities. Allah never put us in such situations for nothing.

So, let's stop here. Because it's already subooh. And yeah, I don't sleep for today. Ergh...



Life isn't always a straight path, it has turn and roundabout, we have to make mistakes so that we can learn and appreciate some value in our life in future. And don't let small things become our ultimate goal but find the ultimate goal and let the small things become the journey.

Love,
AH

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